Funny From the Past - Childhood Dairy

I moved into a new condo recently, it's exciting. Perfect for me, and because it's mine I can paint, hang stuff, and truly unpack for the first time in years. I've moved around the past 3 years, never planned on staying anywhere more than a year, so I never bothered with completely unpacking.

Unpacking surprised me, it was a whirlwind of emotions. Mind, some of these things I have had in boxes for 8 years or more and just cart them from place to place. I found a box of old memorabilia, and some was sad, happy, and some flat out hilarious.

Now, by far the funniest (and saddest) thing I found was the journal I received for my 13th birthday and started writing in the summer before 8th Grade.  That was one of the most traumatic years of my life, a lot happened in my family that would change everything for the rest of our lives. I'm guessing my mom bought me the journal because she knew I loved to write, it wasn't one of those cheesy diaries but a journal with 300 pages neatly bound with pretty lines. Told me how writing feelings is the best way to let them go, address them and eventually talk about them.

I kept this journal with semi frequent regularity all the way through high school.  I thought it would be funny, to share some of the comical ones. I will try not to correct my punctuation (when I journal it spills out of me, so punctuation isn't key at the time, but some corrections will have to be made so it's not a huge run on sentence.)

Inside Cover:
MISTY - My Intimate Secret Teller Year-Round.

First Page:
If you are reading this, I will know, you will feel horrible for being such a horrible nosy person that you will never be able to look at me in the eyes EVER! Even if all you read is this first page, you are evil!!!

June 3rd, 1991

Dear Misty,

I love you! I love this book, I'm going to write in it EVERY SINGLE DAY! I PROMISE! I had the best birthday EVER! It was a surprise birthday party. I swear I had no clue AT ALL. Jo took me down to the A&W to get a shake or snack. I love their mini-tacos. As soon as I got home, full of oreo milkshake and mini tacos. Everyone yelled SURPRISE!! There were so many people there, like 35 people including Justin!! I think we will go out in 8th grade! I will keep my balloon forever!

I can't believe Jo invited Sharry and Christine! Who does that? I mean those bitches wrote a list of 100 reasons why they didn't like me, because I got a new Columbia ski outfit for ski club. THEN called me to tell me the list, I told them to grow up and hung up on them. Then they called back and said, "You ignernt (sooo how she said it, stupid) bitch, how dare you hang up on us!" so I was like, "Whatever, you think I'm stupid enough to sit on the phone and listen to why people don't like me. And look up ignorant, because you obviously don't know the meaning and then look up irony. If you know what a dictionary is." then hung up again. I was so mad at them B-I-T-C-H-E-S! I mean really, who puts the top reason for not liking someone because I don't drink all my milk in a glass and that I have better clothes. Not my fault my mom cares enough to take me shopping. So wasn't happy they were there.

My mom decided to leave with her boyfriend, she went to spend the night at his house. Gross. Jo already had the okay to stay the night, her mom probably thought my mom would be there all night. Soooo... Jo and I decided to take my moms car out driving!! She totally left the keys and gas!! I've only driven with mom or to the restaurants to pick up dinner, but we couldn't help ourseslves.  We headed out of town, but we took the back way so we didn't have to pass her house, if her mom saw the Probe then she'd think my mom wasn't home. We both took turns, it was so fun! THEN we thought we would drive on the freeway to the junction and turn around and come back home. 75 seemed really really fast and this big semi truck was driving fast behind us and I got really scared so I decided to slow down to 45 so he could pass me easily, he was so rude honked and flipped us off out the window. I was trying to be nice. Whatever. We took the country road in to town cause I didn't like the freeway. Then went home and watched Pretty Woman, "I'm not wearing any pantyhose!"

Mom didn't notice anything about us taking the car! Jo decided we are going to try to take her dad's Dodge out next time.

Bye Misty!
Jessica

June 29th, 1991

I have the BIGGEST secret EVER!! Jo, Heather and I have been sneaking out at night when they stay over. We get our bikes put on dark clothes and when cars drive by we pull over and hide on peoples lawns. Sometimes we go to Lee's house, his mom works nights sometimes. Last time they got mad cause I tripped on an can and it was noisy. Well hello! It was dark!  I told Justin about it, he said sometime I should invite him. SO I DID! BUT I didn't have Jo and Heather with me! It was really cold so he gave me his coat, then we went to the dugout and sat on top of it and watched the stars, HE HELD MY HAND! I wanted him to kiss me, I think he wanted to too cause I was sitting on his lap with his coat around me and his cheek next to mine. He asked me if I'd kissed anyone before, and I felt bad saying yes, then he asked me if it was Lee. I was like, um noo, why would he think that. I told him it was last summer at my dad's. He probably didn't believe me because who says that?

But I didn't want to give him more detail, and tell the truth that I was going out with a boy named Jeremy and I kissed his best friend, then I kissed him... IN THE SAME NIGHT! Then decided I wanted Randy over a rigged eeny-meenie-miney-moe picking match. Woo, Randy and I kissed a lot that summer, til dad said he'd shoot him if he caught him kissing me again. then he broke up with me. Said his MOM said he couldn't have a girl friend. Really? So I went back out with Jeremy, but he wasn't a good kisser so I told him MY dad said I couldn't go out with boys.

Back to JUSTIN. I really think this is what love feels like, it has to, I wish he wasn't so shy. But he's soooo cuuuute! And soooo sweeet!

July 25th, 1991

Justin is going with Tara, Heather couldn't wait to come over and tell me they were in love. They were at Lo-Boys playing video games with pizza and holding hands. I said it didn't matter cause I liked someone else too. She knows I was lying, but didn't say anything to me about it.

My dog is playing over at his house with smokey, and I know he will bring him home when it gets dark. I just hope he doesn't bring her too.

I miss my dad, it's been 7 months to the day, I wish nothing changed and I was at his house for the summer kissing Randy. I'd even take Jeremy at this point. That won't happen. I will never see any of my summer friends at dad's ever again. Will I ever see dad again?

August 15th, 1991

Bummer, summer is almost over. Been a ton of fun!! I'm so over Justin! What was I thinking anyway, he's way too tall anyway. I heard that Lee likes me and that's why Justin asked if we kissed. Lee is cute but he is always hanging out with Ryan, who is so mean to me. He spent all last year gleeking on my in math class. The principal said he probably just has a crush. I know we are country, but what does he live with a pack of llamas? Eww!

Potential 8th Grade Boys I Might Go Out With

1. Martin - the new guy from North Dakota! SOO Cute!
2. Keith - He just seems like more of a friend, but everyone likes him.
3. Justin (Just in case, we are neighbors and some times things change. Probably not, so over him)
4. Brad - I heard his voice dropped and he got buff from haying over the summer. As long as he doesn't try to wear that first year mustache thingy that looks all gross.
5. Rob - He lives across the street, we could totally sneak out together!


THE END

I was going to post more, but this has potential for content. The journal ends in 1996, there are so many cute stories.  I promise to post more!

Movie Quotes Involving Food

Lately I've been getting into this Yelp review thing. Today I was setting up my profile and wanted a catchy line to place in the Headline section. So, I started researching funny movie quotes dealing with food. I figured there had to be plenty, but I really found very few sites that had good lists of movie quotes with food. They agreed with some of mine, I ended up choosing the When Harry Met Sally, "I'll have what she's having!" after the infamous fake orgasm scene.

But there are so many more I love, and some good contenders.

One of the one's I wanted, "Leave the gun. Take the cannoli." from The Godfather. Love that line, but I've never actually seen The Godfather movies. I only know this line from You've Got Mail, I guess I like Meg Ryan movies.

Another good one: "I have been trying this new fat free diet I invented. All I've had to eat for the past six days are gummy bears, jelly beans, and candy corns." from Romy & Michele's High School Reunion

And of course, "A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti." from The Silence of the Lambs. (Is it possible to read that without hearing Anthony Hopkins voice?)
I'm going to put some of my favorite food and drink movie and TV quotes below, in no particular order of favorites.

15 Movie Quotes from Movies About Food/Eating

1. "Excuse me, miss? There seems to be a mistake. I believe I ordered the LARGE cappuccino. Hello! Look at the size of this thing." So I Married an Axe Murderer
2. "Ugh, I can actually hear you getting fatter." - Tommy Boy
3. "You look like the Fourth of July! Makes me want a hot dog real bad!" - Legally Blonde
4. "The snozberries taste like snozberries." - Charlie and The Chocolate Factory
5. "Hi, I'm Ricky Bobby, and if you don't chew Big Red, then f*ck you." Talledega Nights Ballad of Ricky Bobby
6. "Wow, that last chili dog's really barking!” - Two Weeks Notice
7. "I'm bigger than you and higher up the food chain. Get in my belly." Austin Powers
8. "This sure doesn't taste like an iced tea." ... "It's from Long Island." - Cruel Intentions
9. "I ate fiberglass insulation. It wasn't cotton candy like the guy said … my tummy itches." - Anchorman
10. "Anyway, like I was sayin', shrimp is the fruit of the sea. You can barbecue it, boil it, broil it, bake it, saute it. Dey's uh, shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo. Pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried. There's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich. That- that's about it." Forrest Gump
11. "See, I'm on this new diet. Well, I don't eat anything. And right before I feel I'm going tofaint, I eat a cube of cheese." Devil Wears Prada
12. "We're packing hot dogs for the road. You know, hot dogs get a bad rep. They gotta cool shape, they got protein." - The Happening
13. "I feel like such a heifer. I had two bowls of Special K, 3 pieces of turkey bacon, a handful of popcorn, 5 peanut butter M&M's and, like, 3 pieces of licorice." Clueless
14. "Knock it off, Napoleon! Just make yourself a dang quesa-dilluh!" - Napoleon Dynamite
15. “Sure, sure I heard of grits. I’ve just never actually seen a grit before” - My Cousin Vinny, 

Now I'm hungry... Hope you enjoy! 

Jessica

Wow... I Pretty Much Suck At This...

Yeah, I do. I think not committing myself to a daily post is the first step. Obviously that only works for a week. If I crash and burn, then break a few bones, I'll use that as an excuse to not post... that turns into a long duration without posting. SO! I'm gonna be honest. I don't know what is gonna happen with this blog, where I'm going with it. I'll make a post when I can, if I can't I won't. I don't want to post just because I said I would. I have a lot of thoughts and ideas that can't be limited by subject, preference, or genre. I'm a Gemini. I'm random. I coined the term "Randombling"... (yeah, I really did) it was one of my first made up words. If this is all engaging enough to keep you coming back, then fantastic! If not... try again in a week or two. Please. I'm open to suggestions, encourage feedback, and I just want to be me. xoxo

Thing a Day #7 | Someecards

That's right, seven whole days... I'm rather impressed with myself! 

I have a habit of starting something and not finishing it, I blame it on being a Gemini. :-) I have too many good ideas to just stick to one. But, I like this one and I'm having a good time. So, thanks to anyone and everyone who's taken the time to check out my blog. 

Today, I'm telling you about these silly ecards, if you have a Facebook, you've probably seen them circulating. If not, you'll learn more here!

Obviously I like things that make you laugh, and these cards do. They usually are a bit sarcastic, completely politically incorrect (which I love), and often say things you really want to say but never do.

There is a huge library of them on the website someecards.com, or you can create your own. Choose from color back ground, picture, and type in your text. Voila! There's no buggy sign up, subscribe, any of that! You can just create, share, copy, save.... 

I went through and found a few I liked to share. 

Thing a Day #6 | Free Movies

Not a lot of people realize that YouTube offers free full-length videos. I'm not talking about the ones that users cut up into ten parts, and are usually less than great quality. They actually have a movie section with free and pay as you watch movies.

I like to go there and see what they are offering for free, they sometimes add a few as a promotion (probably hoping you'll see one you like better and pay for. But I have Netflix, and love it, but occasionally I am looking for something not on their site. LIke any movie watching sites you get tired of the same old selection.

I've put together a list of my favorite movies to watch for free on YouTube. They offer quite a few more, and if you are into classic films they have a ton!

Here is the link for the Free YouTube Movies. Below are my faves (In no particular order)!

Cruel Intentions

In an adaptation of Choderlos de Laclos' novel, Les Liaisons Dangereuses, Kathryn Merteuil (Sarah Michelle Gellar) and Sebastian Valmont (Ryan Phillippe) are step-brother and step-sister living in Manhattan. With their absent parents travelling in Europe, the wealthy pair have the family penthouse to themselves as they while away their summer break before beginning senior year at a private high school. Sebastian, bad-boy lothario, has apparently slept with all the girls in town and appears numb to it all. Kathryn, who appears to be the good girl class president, is actually far more amoral and malicious than Sebastian, but maintains appearances to the contrary. When she is dumped by her boyfriend, Court Reynolds (Charlie O'Connell), for the innocent Cecile Caldwell (Selma Blair), she schemes revenge by destroying Cecile's reputation. She challenges Sebastian to deflower Cecile and transform her into a tramp to humiliate Court. Sebastian isn't as interested as Cecile -- she's spent her whole life in a Catholic girl's school and presents no challenge. The girl who has caught his attention is Annette Hargrove (Reese Witherspoon), the new headmaster's daughter. Annette had written an article for Seventeen Magazine on her plans to stay a virgin until she finds her one true love. Kathryn makes a wager. If Sebastian fails to lure Annette into bed before the summer is over, Kathryn gets his car. If he succeeds, Sebastian gets Kathryn, whom he wants anyway. Sebastian accepts the bet, but Annette turns out to be more than either of them bargained for.

You Don't Mess with the Zohan

Judd Apatow teams up with his former roommate Adam Sandler to write a star comedy vehicle for the actor in You Don't Mess With the Zohan, the tale of an Israeli commando who fakes his own death so he can follow his dream -- to be a hairstylist in New York City. I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry's Dennis Dugan directs for Happy Madison Productions and Columbia Pictures.

Flatliners

Despite its occasional lapses into silly self-consciousness, Flatliners is one of the most intriguing and well-constructed supernatural thrillers of the 1990s. A group of brilliant medical students decide to literally play with life and death. They put themselves in suspended animation, electronically inducing a near-deathlike state and then pulling out of it at the last possible moment. Things get hairy when one of the students (Kiefer Sutherland) becomes obsessed with the notion of really dying, the better to experience the Afterlife before being revived--if he can be revived. In her first dramatic starring role (playing a sensitive young lady on a misguided guilt trip), Julia Roberts is very, very good--completely bereft of movie-star mannerisms. Audiences flocked to see Flatliners back in 1990 due to the highly publicized off-screen romance between Roberts and Sutherland. Oh, yes: Kevin Bacon and William Baldwin are in the picture, too.

Hollowman

In this sci-fi thriller, a man and a woman must fend off a killer whom they cannot see. Scientist Sebastian Caine (Kevin Bacon) is working with a secret military research team headed by Dr. Kramer (William Devane), assigned to create new intelligence technology. With the help of his colleagues Linda McKay (Elisabeth Shue) and Matt Kensington (Josh Brolin), Sebastian has been developing a serum that makes people invisible. The formula is new and unstable, but after a risky but successful test on an ape, an impatient Sebastian, under pressure from Kramer, decides to try it on himself. It works, but no one counted on the side effects; unable to reverse the serum's effects, an invisible Sebastian goes insane, and begins pursuing Linda (his former girlfriend) and Matt (Linda's current beau) in a fog of homicidal rage. Directed by Paul Verhoeven, Hollow Man also features Kim Dickens, Mary Randle, Joey Slotnick, and Greg Grunberg.

Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby

When America's number one NASCAR speed-demon is issued a direct challenge from a gay, French Formula One racer with a hunger for the top spot and a mean talent for tight-cornering, the race is on to become the number one man in all of NASCAR in a full throttle comedy starring Will Ferrell and directed by Anchorman cohort Adam McKay. Ricky Bobby (Ferrell) is a national hero with a "smokin' hot" trophy wife, pair of borderline-abusively precocious sons, and an endless line of endorsement deals filling his mansion with toys and driveway with sports cars and Hummers. His racing partner and lifelong friend Cal Naughton, Jr. (John C. Reilly), never fails to provide him with a hand on the racetrack, frequently performing their trademark "slingshot" maneuver to shoot Ricky into first place, leaving Cal in second. While the public loves these buddies (popularly known by the meaningless childhood nicknames they find so exceedingly cool: "Shake and Bake"), a wedge comes between the two, as Ricky Bobby's longstanding winning-streak is broken by flamboyand French Formula One driver Jean Girard (Sacha Baron Cohen), robbing Ricky of everything in an instant as the trauma leaves him unable to drive. Ricky's wife takes his fortunes while Cal takes his wife, and now he's back with his mother (Jane Lynch) and long-estranged father (Gary Cole). Things look bad for Ricky, but his father was once a race car driver himself, and now with the help of a training montage, a live cougar, and the courage to drive without his gleaming white Wonder Bread endorsement, Ricky might be ready to face the track again.

Endless Love

With the single-minded passion of young, first love, 17-year-old David and Jade are totally consumed by their feelings for each other. As Jade and David's relationship becomes more intense, however, it begins to take its toll on the 15-year-old high school girl.

Big Daddy

Prospective parents everywhere, meet the world's least likely paternal role model: Adam Sandler! In Big Daddy, Sandler plays 30-year-old bachelor Sonny Koufax, a carefree slob who has never much taken to adult responsibilities; he works one day a week as a tollbooth collector, and spends the remainder of his time living off of a $200,000 reward he collected from an auto accident. All told, the life suits him just fine. However, as his old buddies start getting married and drifting away, Sonny realizes that if he doesn't do something soon, he could end up all alone for the rest of his life. When his most recent girlfriend, Vanessa (Kristy Swanson), indicates that she needs some time off because she's sick of being with a man who can't act like a grown-up, he decides that it's time to take drastic action to win her back. Conveniently enough, a little boy named Julian (Cole Sprouse and Dylan Sprouse) turns up on his doorstep, claiming that he's the biological son of Sonny's roommate and friend from law school, Kevin (Jon Stewart). 

The Freshman

In this farcical comedy, Matthew Broderick plays Clark Kellogg, an aspiring director who arrives in New York City to attend film school. However, moments after he arrives in the city, he's robbed by Victor Ray (Bruno Kirby), leaving him no money for the $700 in books required by his instructor, Arthur Fleeber (Paul Benedict). A few days later, Clark runs into Victor and demands his money back, but Victor has already lost it (on a horse race in which he wasn't entirely sure the animal he bet on was a horse). Instead, he offers to fix Clark up with a job with his boss, an "importer and exporter" named Carmone Sabatini (Marlon Brando), who bears a stunning resemblance to Don Corleone in The Godfather. Clark's adventures with Sabatini are just beginning when he's instructed to pick up a package from the airport. Clark is expecting it to be contraband, and he's right, but not in the way he figured -- it turns out he's accepting delivery of a komodo dragon, which is to be served at a "gourmet club" specializing in dishes prepared from endangered species. Marlon Brando's hilarious comic variation on one of his best-known roles is the highlight of this film, but Bruno Kirby and Paul Benedict also deliver fine comic turns, and Matthew Broderick

The Scarlet Letter (1934 Version)

Previously filmed with Lillian Gish in 1926, Nathaniel Hawthorne's The Scarlet Letter was given a remarkably faithful treatment by low-budget Majestic Pictures in 1934. In her last film appearance, Colleen Moore stars as 17th-century Salem resident Hester Prynne, who when she delivers a child out of wedlock is forced by the prudish townspeople to wear the scarlet "A" for adultery. The father of the baby is none other than Reverend Dimmesdale (Hardie Albright), who wants to confess to his indiscretion but is prohibited from doing so by the pious Hester. Things come to a sorry pass when Hester's long-missing husband Roger Chillingworth (Henry B. Walthall, repeating his role from the 1926 version) returns to Salem and demands a few immediate answers. The film's colonial-era milieu is not always realized, due to inconsistent period costumes and phraseology; also, the direction and acting ranges from adequate to stilted. Still, this Scarlet Letter is a lot more worthwhile than Demi Moore's vanity remake of 1995.

Donny Brasco

This drama about an undercover cop who learns the hidden dangers of working his way inside the mob was based on a true story. Joe Pistone (Johnny Depp) is an FBI agent who is given an assignment to infiltrate the Mafia; calling himself Donnie Brasco, he befriends Lefty Ruggiero (Al Pacino), a low-level mob hit man whose personal life is in tatters. Lefty's marriage is falling apart, his son is a junkie, and his health is failing, which only adds to his growing disillusionment about having spent 30 years with the Mafia (and killing 26 people) with little to show for it. But in Donnie, Lefty sees someone who can succeed where he failed; he takes the young man under his wing, and under Lefty's tutelage Donnie quickly rises through the ranks of organized crime; however, the longer he plays the role of the gangster, the more Joe Pistone finds himself becoming Donnie Brasco in his increasingly rare off hours; it drives a wedge between himself and his wife (Anne Heche) and children, and Joe realizes that a break in character among the hoodlums he's come to know could mean a death sentence for himself and his family. Just as importantly, Joe has come to regard Lefty as a close and trusted friend, and Joe realizes that when the day comes where he has to turn in his Mob associates, he'll be ending Lefty's life as surely as if he put a slug in his head himself. The supporting cast includes Michael Madsen as Sonny, Lefty's boss, and Bruno Kirby as Nicky, one of Sonny's henchmen. The real-life Joe Pistone today lives under an assumed name with a 500,000-dollar contract on his life still in effect.

The Little Princess

Shirley Temple's first Technicolor feature, The Little Princess was inspired by the oft-filmed novel by Frances Hodgson Burnett. Set in turn-of-the-century England, the film finds Temple being enrolled in a boarding school by her wealthy widowed father (Ian Hunter), who must head off to fight in the Boer War. At first, Temple is treated like royalty; her behavior couldn't be more down to earth, but this preferential treatment foments resentment. When her father is reported killed in the war, circumstances are severely altered. The spiteful headmistress (Mary Nash) relegates Temple to servant status and forces the girl to sleep in a drafty attic. She keeps her spirits up by hoping against hope that her father will return, and to that end she haunts the corridors of a nearby military hospital. Queen Victoria doesn't have to make a guest appearance in the tearfully joyous closing sequence, but it does serve as icing on the cake to this, one of Temple's most enjoyable feature films. Reliable Shirley Temple flick supporting actors Cesar Romero and Arthur Treacher are back in harness in The Little Princess, while adult leading lady Anita Louise figures prominently in a sugary dream sequence.

Thing a Day #5 | Text Messaging

Text Messaging seems to have taken over forms of communication. I rather like it. Sorry, if you were expecting some philosophical debate on how it's ruing personal communication.  I have no real opinion on that. I can equally see both sides of the debate.

I like how it's quick and I don't have to stop whatever I'm doing to make time to answer a phone call. I am an avid, "Call me when you get a chance" texter, or, "are you free to talk later"  because that way both people are setting aside time to have a quality conversation.  How many times have you called someone to ask a question, talked for fifteen minutes then after hanging up realized you forgot to ask your question? Texting eliminates this... "I'm meeting everyone at the movies at 5, want to go together?" Simple.

I'm one of those people that gets phone numbers from everyone. If I'm out with friends and I meet someone I'll grab a number or send a funny picture to them while hanging out so they can forward it. This happens often, so I have a ton of numbers from people I don't really know. I'm going to share one in particular with you that I find absolutely hilarious.

I met this guy when out with friends, we'd seen him there a few times and as it goes one time we all started up a conversation. There was a funny message I'd had from Christmas and I shared it with him.

A week later I hadn't texted him, nor him me... My friend and I were at the same place and there was a guy we thought was him wearing a beanie hat, but we couldn't figure out whether it was him or not. So, I had a great idea, I'd look at the message I sent him to get his number and text him.

Me: Are you wearing a hat?

     Him: Should I be?

Me: Maybe you should.

     Him: Are You wearing a hat?

Me: No, I am not, I have a hoodie though. Does that count?

     Him: Is the hood up?

Me: No

     Him: Then no.

A week later

Him: Are you wearing a hat?

     Me: No, haha! Are you?

Him: No, but I will if it makes a difference! Lol

     Me: Haha! :-) It might

Him: It's like we're talking in code, but no one knows what it means if you wear a hat or not LOL!!!

Him: I'll bring a hat next Thursday night and you can see if it does nor not. Me and my buddy are planning on going out Thursday. Are you gonna go?

    Me: Not sure but ya never know.

Him: If you go will you be sure to say hi to everyone wearing a hat ;-)

     Me: It's possible. Maybe I'll wear a hat. LOL

Him: Baseball cap or are you a fedora kinda girl? Are you going this weekend at all?

     Me: I rock a fedora. LOL I have a date tomorrow night, tonight catching up on reading my book.

2 Days Later

     Me: (Picture of me in a fedora) Caption says: Hat?

Him: LOL & matching shirt!

     Me: Nice eye

4 Days Later

Him: Going hatless

     Me: I'm chilling hatless at home tonight.

Him: With your hat collection?

     Me: All I have are ski hats.

9 Days Later

     Me: Are you wearing a hat?

Him: LOL no. I should. Need a haircut. Good thing I'm getting one tomorrow.

     Me: A hat or haircut?

Him: LOL good question, you're sharp. Haircut.

     Me: Why not a hat?

Him: I have a lot already.

     Me: Do you have a cat? A cat in a hat?

Him: No cat, but if I had one, you better believe I'd put him in the hat.

8 Days later

Him: I heard a rumor that we are both wearing hats.

     Me: Are you wearing a hat?

Him: Are you wearing a hat?

     Me: No

Him: No

     Me: False rumor.

3 Weeks Later

Him: Are you wearing a hat?

     Me: No... but I see a hat.

Him: Is there a cat in it?

     Me: No but there is one in between me and the hat.

Him: Pounce on him, then gently place him into aforementioned hat.

     Me: He's too fat to fit inside said hat.

Him: Blast! Foiled again.

     Me: (Picture of the hat on the cat)

Him: Close enough for me!

    

If it wasn't late right now I'd ask him if he's wearing a hat, dang! So, I've met him once, and we are already friends. I wouldn't know him if I saw him on the street. But I think this is absolutely hilarious.

Go out and get yourself a text pen pal too, maybe they like wearing hats?

I found some super funny text messages online at work today... must share my favorites!

I seriously died laughing at some of these, enjoy!!

Thing a Day #4 | Books

I love to read! Reading for me is a total escape from reality. I've noticed that a lot of people don't like to read, I think this is simply because they haven't found the right book, or style of writing.

An example: My best friend always hated reading, and had recently told me she's always hated that I take her to book stores. I had always thought this was an activity we both liked, cause when we were in our teens we'd pick out a book at a used book store and go to the park and read it together. These weren't novels, more like books on horoscopes, dreams, or even magazines. Apparently she didn't enjoy the book stores, but because I dragged her along she more or less agreed to get one with me so we could get out of there. 

 A few months ago she saw the 4th Twilight movie Breaking Dawn, she really wanted to know what happened in the second half. If you aren't familiar with the Twilight series, the 4th book (Breaking Dawn) was made into a 2 part movie, they haven't released the second movie from book 4 yet. So, knowing I had read the series she asked me, I told her I wasn't going to tell her . If she wanted to find out what happens she'd have to go get the book. She did, just the 4th book (Breaking Dawn). Three days later she was at the book store buying book 1 (Twilight), and so on. This was in December since she's read 15 books.

If you don't like vampires or fantasy there are all sorts of YA fiction books that can get your brain in shape again so you can move onto books with more complex story lines.

I'll get off my soapbox now...

I really like to stick with an author once I've enjoyed on of their books, which is why I gravitate towards series. If you are (or are not) a reader try not to get overwhelmed by the size of a book. If it's a good read that just means there is more to read, and you're not sitting there after the book ends wishing there was more, well, not as quickly anyway.

I was planning on doing a top ten books or authors, but I feel like I'd truncate things too much so right now I'm going to focus on one.

OUTLANDER by Diana Gabaldon

This is my NUMBER ONE BEST LOVED MORE THAN ANYTHING IN THE ENTIRE WORLD book (series).

Why I was skeptical.

Time Travel... Really?, 18th Century Scottish Wars... Ugh?, How many pages... No way!

All these had me against this series, but Diana Gabaldon somehow it's pulled off in this series, maybe because in 7 books there is exactly 5 occurences of time travel, back and forth between 18th and 20th century. So, even though it is a character defining aspect, it isn't book defining. Make sense? Claire the main character and narrator, she is super strong willed, opinionated, not at all traditional woman... and by a force of natural phenomenon finds her self in a time where women were property. She meets someone, and falls in love, hard, but misses her home and her husband in the 20th century. There are all sorts of tricky situations she gets into because she it isn't in her to be a submissive woman.  The writing constantly has me laughing, Claire will think something and it will make me laugh out loud because it's a thought I would have but never admit to anyone.


Outlander takes place in Scotland, and is filled with a rich appreciation for the country and it's people. While reading I would often research things as I came upon them, such as where exactly IS Scotland. Yes, I know... but I really did look. As I got more into the first book I was looking up clan histories, Gaelic, music and all sorts of things... Thank God for Wikipedia and YouTube. I started to fall in love with the dynamic of the country, the scenery, and their history

So far there are 7 published books in this order:

1. Outlander
2. Dragonfly in Amber
3. Voyager
4. Drums of Autumn
5. Fiery Cross
6. A Breath of Snow and Ashes
7. Echo in the Bone
8. (2013)Written In My Own Hearts Blood

I went through Goodreads.com and here are some lines from people's reviews to show how passionate they are about these books. Their names link to their review if you want to read more.

HeatherJay: As I am currently without any books to read and nothing catching my interest, I decide to finally give it a try.......... All I can say is " I cannot believe I wasted almost 20 years of my life without reading this book!" I won't go into the plot as it's already been covered, but, Holy Shit, this is one fantastic book! 

Claire: Don't let the romance label put you off, this series is difficult to define. The historical content is accurate and amazing, the characters are amazingly real and complicated, the storylines interesting and unexpected - really, I just can't say enough great things about this series.

Shell S: It took me a crazy long time, to convince myself to pick up these books. Convinced it just wasn't my thing, I ignored the numerous pleas from fellow book lover friends, to take on this series. Eventually of course, their tenacious badgering, and my over all curiousity won out in the end... And... Amazing. Beautiful, Magical, Heart wrenching, fantastic, awe inspiring, mind blowing, epic in its originality. My all time favorite books, ones I will forever keep, and read over, and over again.

"I Promised Ye Honesty"

To be fair, these books aren't for everyone. My mom didn't care for them. There are some intense sex scenes, language and violence that some people may find offensive.  The thing I really like is how the historical scenes are so accurate. I learned so much about English/Scottish history that it became a new favorite genre of reading.

To be fair here are some additional reviews from readers who weren't as impressed as I am.

Methodtomadness: The book needs some sort of warning on the cover for those like myself, who aimlessly pick it up secondhand thinking, "time travel, Scotland, men in kilts, okay, I'm on board," and then grow progressively more irritated and unamused at Gabaldon's love of whips and general abuse for women, kids, adult men -- oh, right, basically everyone.  

Emily G: After that many pages take your time to wrap it up, don't squeeze it into a couple of paragraphs. My other pet peeve was with the number of times the main characters were suddenly thrust into a life/death situation and barely survived.

Mark B: The narrative moves in fits and starts. I guess that's fitting since the novel was broken into seven sections, but there's a lot of time where there's not so much movement and then a lot of things happen at once. Some of the sections are better than others. Some are harder to follow. It's tough to keep track of who's been kidnapped and what jail they're in and who is trying to break them out, at times.

I have many more suggestions in various genres, if you want suggestions based on what you like I'd be more than happy to share.

Check out Goodreads.com too, it's a great resource!